Lu

Share your story

Unexpected feelings

2019 United States

What were your feelings about doing the abortion/s?

For an unexplainable reason I'm hurt by this loss. For some reason flushing down the toilet (literally), what could have been my baby felt wrong. I never dreamed I would think of an unthinking, unfeeling, thing the size of a raspberry, as .. . Deserving. As needing taken care of. As deserving not to be just thrown away. I totally respect everyone's choice but for some reason I grew an attachment to that thing inside of me. I knew I was pregnant before the missed period. I felt my body change and at first I felt punished. Trapped. scared. I was so worried about how to make it stop and get back to my old self I didn't realize I was also subconsciously feeling every second of that pregnancy. I guess it left some weird imprint on me. I don't know how to tell my partner that it still hurts me. He doesnt get it when I try to tell him that it was a huge experience for me and I need time to heal. I wish I was one of those people who just go on with their life like nothing happened but ive always been pretty sensitive

How did you do the abortion?

I had a medical abortion. With a heating pad and tramadol, the pain was bearable. The bleeding stopped after a week. Going back to work was extremely hard for me at first as my job is very physically demanding but I got through it.

What was your situation at this time?

Did the illegality of your abortion affect your feelings?

The protesters who were outside of every clinic visit, yelling "repent" and "it's not too late" with their giant pictures of fetuses and whatnot. .. to the recent string of abortion/birth control bans and criminalization. I was so afraid I wouldn't have access to choice (I do thanks to the acula and pp and organizations like women have options who helped me AFFORD it). And after the abortion I feel less angry at those ignorant prolifers, I feel more.. grief. Which is their objective I'm sure. ..

How did other people react to your abortion?

Indifferent/ nonchalant. My partner and I have always agreed to an abortion in case an accident ever happened.. and it did. I'm not brave enough or ready to tell my mother. I need time. I never dreamed it would affect me this way. I drunkenly told one of my few female friends. I work in a male dominated field and most of my friends are male. I don't think any of them could react in a way that would be comforting or worth validation as they can't understand. So I haven't told anyone really. Guess that's why I'm here.

legal/illegal

What is your religion?

Bia

E no começo me arrependi mas vi que seria a melhor opção, e escrevendo meu…

fiore fiol

Yo me practique un aborto con citotec porque acababab de tener una bebe y…

serenity

DECISIONES!!

P

...Lo quería pero no podía

Tiffany

I am still healing from my decision - it really is a wide range of emotions.

Fernanda

Yo aborté y soy una chica libre

mary cry

pior momento de minha vida

Leonor Leonor

Mi madre quería nietos... Yo solo quiero dejar de recriminarme.

Izabela

Mam 20 lat i zupełnie nie byłam przygotowana na ciąże.
Ja i mój chłopak…

Aby

I felt it was accapted to have an abortion

dh

Ik heb een abortus gehad

keira

Chcę mieć kontrolę. Zrobiłam to i NIE ŻAŁUJĘ.

Wzięłam pierwszą tabletkę, czułam…

~ Energia divina en la mujer ~

Yo decidí abortar : Cuando tuve conocimiento que me encontraba en estado de…

Magda

To była moja decyzja!

Gabriela

Abortei aos 17 anos.

Carolina

Me enfrente a la injusticia de haber nacido mujer

Sara

Completei o processo há cinco dias e não consigo deixar de pensar no assunto

YoungWoman from India

This website gave me the confidence that I could do it. It gave me all the…