Suzanne W.

We did not tell anyone. Our family, in the US, would not have supported our decision. We had planned kept the pregnancy secret from them until prenatal testing was over. Since the testing came back with a poor diagnosis, we decided not to tell them at all. Otherwise, the only people who knew were my doctor and my husband. I also found help in an online group of women who had been through similar experiences.

I was grateful to be able to have the procedure done in a hospital and not in a clinic. The privacy was most welcome and although the experience was painful and difficult, I can only imagine that the alternatives would have been worse.

My baby was diagnosed with Trisomy 21 with complicating health factors involving the development of the vessels in the placenta. With my health compromised due to excessive bleeding, and the baby's chance of survival low due to the incorrectly functioning placenta, we chose to terminate the pregnancy. It was a difficult decision to be faced with, especially because it was a much wanted pregnancy.

We grieved for a long time, but it was not the decision to terminate that made us sad. It was the fact that our baby had to be so sick that made us numb and sorrowful. We were sure that we made the correct decision for all involved. We have never felt guilt about our decision - not about the termination. The only regret I have felt is regret that he (our baby) was not given the correct genetic makeup to allow him to survive and have a healthy life.

The anger I have felt is due to people who would dare to judge people like me who find themselves in a situation where they have to make a decision which is heartbreaking; especially when they dare to speak for me or try to put words in my mouth about my reasons. And I think that should resonate with any woman who has to make the decision to abort a pregnancy. For whatever reason, it is never done lightly.