Elizabeth

I had an abortion I was 16 - just sixteen, which turned out to be awfully convienent. It was 5 years ago. I was born into a small, middle class family; my parents are devout Methodists. I did not tell them and made excuse after excuse as to where I was going when I disappeared to have it. I had the surgical option. It was the only viable thing I could have done, not that this was ever understood. Going through with the pregnancy would have brought untold shame unto my family; the father of the baby was a drifter and could never have supported me or the child. I see him briefly when I return to my home town - he is still jobless. I took every step to ensure I did not fall pregnant, and I simply drew the medical short straw. It was a horrific experience and I still cannot believe that I ever fell pregnant. I suffered a lot for the decision I took. My family eventually found out a year later when I had a breakdown. I do not regret what I did. There was no viable other option: adoption would have destroyed me and my family. I could not have kept the child. Five years on, I am finishing my degree, and I know that while what I did went against God, it was the only option I had at the time. No-one would have been there for me: not my friends or my family. It kills me what I did; but it would have finished me had I chosen to continue the pregnancy.